October 28. And according to the crazy calendar, it is Plush Animal Lovers Day. My human always marvels at photos of dogs with their piles of stuffed toys. They carry them, they play with them - they love them. But not in this sadistic household. We torture them. Heaven forbid they have eyes - those would go first. And then we proceed to either decapitate the unfortunate victim, or dismember him. Remember the time I amputated the bunny's leg - and threw it up a week later? You think I would have learned after that episode, not to mutilate stuffed toys. But if given the chance, my human is SURE I would. I can only have them for a game of fetch - and IF my human is with me.
Speaking of games, it was raining the other night, so my human decided to pull out those old Swedish board games. The ones we got for Christmas a few years ago. Remember, she didn't buy us the Leve1 1 games - she went right for the Level 3 games - she figured we were SO smart. Big mistake. So first I got to play, while Velcro dog and the Friendly Giant were sequestered in the hall - watching me through the french door. The one covered in olfactory art. Anyway, we played the game with the little drawers. You hide a treat in a drawer and the dog has to sniff it out. Well of course I am brilliant at it - so my human adds the "more difficult" part. You insert these black pegs in the drawer, so you FIRST have to lift out the peg and THEN you can open the drawer. It took a while before I figured out the peg part. I was wildly scratching and pawing at the whole thing and basically trying to destroy the whole board. If my human wasn't holding the board, it would have been game over. Anyway I figured out how to pull out the peg, and if given the chance, would have chewed on it. But my human was sitting right there - so after I pulled out the peg she encouraged me to open the drawer. Which I did. So after each time that I got the treats, I was instructed to lie down and wait while my human filled a new drawer. So my human goes to insert the peg that I had taken out, and there IS no peg. Now this peg thing is not all that small - it's shaped like a tack - with a 1.5" round disk that is 1/4" thick and peg in the middle is about 1" in height. So she frantically looks for the peg. She knew I had eaten the treats when I opened the drawer - but did I ALSO swallow the peg? Her blood pressure begins to rise. HOW could I have swallowed it?! It's NOT small!! As she is looking around, I am bouncing around waiting for the next game. The sweat is pouring off her and she takes me into the bedroom so she can search alone without me going crazy. She gets down on her hands and knees and looks around the carpet - which, by the way is partly black in color. She CANNOT find it. She looks at another peg and can't imagine how I could have swallowed it. Her mind immediately races to those websites that have photos of things that dogs have swallowed - like steak knives and light bulbs. What to do? What to do? Go to the emergency clinic? She's REALLY sweating now. She goes to the bedroom and looks at me and I'm raring to go for another game. She goes back to the board game. And goes down on her hands and knees. Again. And crawls all over the carpet. And there, about 4 feet away is the peg. In my raucous attempt to get the treats, I must have tossed the peg. Talk about a happy human. She was so relieved - she gave me a handful of treats.
Then it was the Friendly Giant's turn to play. He basically sat and stared at the board. Even after he WATCHED her put the treats in the drawer. Out of sight, out of mind. He got to go down to the rec room and play with a ball instead. Which my human retrieves for him.
Frodo has no patience for board games. He gets the concept, but sees no point in them. He would rather destroy the board instead.
So that was the night of fun and games. If you ask me, destroying stuffed toys is still a lot more fun!
Happy Friday!
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