Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Dinner is served...


So.  Today, let’s talk about eating.  I am a PON.  I LOVE to eat.  I will stand at the door that goes to the garage – where the dog food is stored, and I will stare longingly at the door.  In the hopes that it will open.  And I might rush in and find that the food bin has been left open.  On the floor.  For me to devour.  All by myself.  It’s my dream….



When I was little, I discovered one day that the food was kept in a big, bin.  Bigger than me.  And taller than me.  But that was no deterrent to me – I just jumped in.  Or tried to….Here is a photo that my Mom snapped of me with my back feet off the ground – trying to get into that bin.  I was attempting to grab whatever bites of food I could get.  The photo almost looks like a wig – but nope – it’s my butt!  And my back legs.  After that, Mom moved the food bin to higher ground.  Darn.

 
Now while I LOVE to eat food, we also have Bucket Head, er Paxton.  Paxton loves food too.  Paxton actually loves to eat almost anything.  Gloves, entire rolls of paper towel,  hair from his own tail…Seriously, I love my big brother but he IS kinda weird when it comes to some of the stuff he will eat.  The WORST was this winter…



Mom took Frodo and I for a walk one morning.  We weren’t 20 feet from the front door when Mom’s feet went straight out from under her and kerplump…she sat down REALLY, REALLY hard.  Then she said some word that I can’t print here, and then repeated “oh no, oh no, oh NO.”  She got to her feet and said we had to go in.  I said, “WHY????????? We just came out!!!”  Frodo said, “Please Viktor, can you not see that our mother has injured herself? Here mother, allow me to guide you back into our residence.”  Me?  I still wanted to walk.  Anyway.  My Mom ended up going to the hospital and came home with a great big thing called a cast on her arm.  And a sling… She wasn’t supposed to wear the sling all the time –  but just until she got home.  So she placed it on the counter…



One week later, Paxton wasn’t feeling so good.  He didn’t even want to eat his supper, which was fine with me – because I was happy to have it for him.  But Mom put a stop to that.  Anyway, Mom took Paxton to the Vet.  And do you know what the Vet found??????????????????  Two feet of sling in Paxton’s stomach!!!!!!!!!! EEEEWWWWWWWWW.  He had to have…get ready…his intestinals cut open and the sling came out – all in ONE piece!!!!!  EEEWWWWWWWW.  And THEN when he came home – he had to wear a LAMPSHADE on his head.  Well, not on his head – but around his neck.  Now I LOVE to lick Paxtons’ face – but I wasn’t going near him with that get up.



Since then, he hasn’t eaten anything tooooo crazy.  Mom makes sure that he can’t get things – although he HAS been known to steal the mail off the counter.  And I help him shred it.  Hey – we’re just doing our bit for recycling!!  But as for anything bigger than an envelope – I’ll leave THAT to the lampshade guy!  You would never catch me wearing one of those things!




© 2014 Linda Wozniak

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