A PONderson Cooper interview...

Hi everyone. It’s PONderson Cooper from PNN (PON News Network) and today I will interview my “other brother” – Paxton, the Bernese Mountain Dog.

Viktor: Hello Paxton, how are you today.

Paxton: Frodo told me that I will get extra biscuits if I do this interview. Is that correct? And DON’T call yourself PONderson Cooper.

Viktor: Yeah. Yeah. Now please just answer my questions…

Paxton: Fire away bro.

Viktor: So what is it like to be a Bernese Mountain Dog?

Paxton: What an interesting question….Well, I’ve never been a Chihuahua or a PON – so it’s not like I can make a comparison. Mind you I LIVE with you two PONs so I guess I DO have something to compare. Being in the minority in this house is QUITE a unique experience…

Viktor: Just tell me what Bernese Mountain Dogs are like, OK? Can you do that?

Paxton: Chill bro. OK, it’s GREAT to be a Bernese Mountain Dog. We are big, we like people and other dogs, we like to eat – all kinds of things – we like drafting…

Viktor: Drafting? Does that have something to do with beer?

Paxton: No bro. Drafting is pulling a cart.

Viktor: Cool! And why do you draft?

Paxton: We were originally farm dogs. We would pull carts to the market. And we would guard our farms and drive cattle.

Viktor: YOU have a drivers license??!!!! What kind of car do you have?!!!! Can you take me to the mall later?

Paxton: Not THAT kind of driving bro. Driving as in moving cattle around.

Viktor: You move cattle?! I move sheep! I probably could move cattle – actually ANYTHING that sees ME coming would move. Away. Fast.

Paxton: I thought this interview was supposed to be about ME.

Viktor: Oh right. So. You like to go in the lake. Why do you do that?

Paxton: That’s a simple one. To get away from you and Frodo. You guys don’t like the water. So I walk out a short distance in the water and sit on a big rock. And you two stand on the shore, watching me. And you won’t come out there. It’s my Zen place.

Viktor: OK. So. What’s it like to live with two PONs?

Paxton: Seriously? You want to know? Well let’s just put it this way – it’s a good thing I have a SUPER temperament. When Frodo came along, I was quite happy – he’s a quiet, low key kind of guy. Life was good. And then….you came along….and life has never been the same…

Viktor: So I am a life-changer!

Paxton: That’s one way of putting it…But I have managed to train you to help me shred things – and we DID have that day that we destroyed the dog bed. You started it and I helped.

Viktor: No. I think YOU started it and I helped.

Paxton: Whatever. Good times…

Viktor: Can I lick your face now?

Paxton: No. Just pass the biscuits.