The dogsitter

OK.  Something is going on.  I heard my human.  She said to someone on the phone something about a “conference.” And something about a flight.   I haven’t seen the suitcases yet – but if it’s true and my human is going away – that means two things:  DOGSITTER and PARTEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Now don’t get me wrong – we ARE sad when our human goes away – but while she is gone we have THE BEST dogsitter who comes and lives in our house.  She is a SUPER nice lady – and we have her very well trained.  We go through that treat jar in no time.  The first time she came here…well, it’s a MIRACLE she came back.  Our human must pay her well…That first visit – well, we got away with MURDER.  All of our manners went out the window…

First off, we decided that having a screen in the patio door was just silly.  And since we couldn’t open it ourselves – we made our own entrance while our dogsitter was taking a shower.  Canines - 1.  Dogsitter -0.

Then Paxton stole some mail off the counter and did some shredding.  Canines -2.  Dogsitter -0.

We decided that sleeping in until 7 was ridiculous – so we kept trying to get her up earlier and earlier by squeaking like we needed to go out.  We had her getting up at 6, 5, 4AM….  Canines – 3. Dogsitter - 0.

And if she went to watch TV in the rec room, we would stand upstairs and bark like there was someone at the front door.  Which of course there wasn’t.  We just didn’t want her watching TV.  Canines – 4.  Dogsitter -0.

But the best – or worst depending on your point of view, was when she came out of the bathroom and couldn’t find her cell phone.  She kept walking around the house, trying to find it.  And I followed her everywhere, wagging my stubby little tail as I went.  Then she happened to notice that my shaggy cheeks were bulging out.  Yup.  I was carrying her phone around.  Canines – 5.  Dogsitter -0.

Now one might think that our behavior would send most people running.  But she’s a very resilient human.  And after a number of visits – she is now used to us.  She never lets down her guard.  After one visit, she actually made out a report card to give our human.  Paxton got an “A”, Frodo got an “A+” (of course) and well….I got an “F.”   I like to keep things interesting!!!!!

But lately, I HAVE been behaving – and we ALL have been better.  In fact, the last time she was here, she told our human that she ran into one of the neighbors and asked the neighbor what our human had done to the dogs – we were so good!  She thinks it’s maturity.  Nah.  It’s actually a ploy so that she’ll let down her guard! 

We don’t want our human to go away…but we WILL make the best of it! Besides – she will probably bring us presents when she comes home!!!!  Gotta love dog guilt.  And extra nice dogsitters.

©  2014 Linda Wozniak