At 4AM, yesterday, I decided my human had had enough rest. I mean how many hours does the woman need? Besides, I was hungry. So I kept staring at her. And jumping on and off the bed. But she could hear it pouring outside - and after all it WAS Saturday, so she didn't want to get up. I FINALLY managed to move her at 5:45. She went into the bathroom to wash her face and she was not in there for a minute when she heard a sound. Riiiiiiiiiiiiip. She immediately figured it was ME tearing another pillowcase - so she started shouting "VIKTOR stop it!" Without even seeing me. She threw the bathroom door open - and there was EINSTEIN - on the bed - destroying her pillowcase. She's starting to wonder what it is with us and pillowcases. She evicted him from the bed and went back to brush her teeth.
As she went to take us out - she noticed that I was limping. Clearly, during one of my numerous bed jumps I landed awkwardly. She decided to ignore it - and just as well - within minutes I was fine. She took the FG out first - during a break in the torrential rains. He did his thing and she then went to walk me and Einstein. Well, walk is not exactly the correct term. More like drag. It was WET out. And while I'm not THAT bad about damp conditions, Einstein could NOT have looked more grumpy. He was furious. He sees NO point in going out in wet weather, AND as he often does, he protests by refusing to poop. One would THINK he would go quickly to get back in the house and sometimes he does. But yesterday was an APP - an anti-poop protest. He walked or rather plodded along the road with total disgust on his face. Now because humans KNOW our metabolism and pay close attention to our bodily functions - and they KNOW our routine, my human KNEW he needed to poop. I mean he hadn't pooped in 24 hours. And after all, we HAD dragged her out of bed - so she was NOT going back in the house without results. I did my thing. Twice. But Einstein kept walking sullenly. We went ALL the way down the road, and all the way back home. And as we approached the house, Einstein's happy gait returned. Little did he know my human wasn't finished walking him. She left him outside, put me in the house and proceeded to walk around the house to the trail. OOOOOOOO-EEEEEEE. He was REALLY not happy. I mean walking on the wet road is bad enough - but walking through the wet lawn and puddles on the trail - he was NOT a happy camper. They walked down - or trudged down to the lake and on the way back, he stopped to poop. Not once. Twice. My human had that look of accomplishment and glee - and Einstein just shook himself off, ignored her smile and trotted back to the house.
So why the bad behavior from Einstein? I think it may be my fault. And the FG's. We have been doing a LOT of hair styling with Einstein lately - and he is not always pleased with the results. Personally, I think we give him a distinctive look. He thinks we are responsible for bad hair days. And for him, bad hair days result in bad behavior. Simple.
So it looks like our salon skills will have to be put on hold for a while - two bad dogs at a time are quite enough for my human. Mind you - I HAVE been better behaved lately- remember the bunny story - so maybe we should simply consider this a case of rotational badness. Yup. That's what we are calling it. Rotational badness. So it was the FG on Thursday... Einstein on Saturday... Looks like I'm up! Let's see what I can get into today.
Have a good one!
No comments:
Post a Comment