National Inventor's Day

February 11.  Today is National Inventor’s Day.  A day to celebrate all those clever people who create things that we less-creative-beings use every day.

So I decided to look up some “dog inventions” – things that are supposed to make life with us dogs so much better.  As far as I can see, not ALL inventions are such a great idea…

For example, there is a pet escalator for your home.  It works kind of like those things that help disabled humans to get up and down stairs.  This one is actually designed for obese dogs.  I kid you not.  And it ONLY costs $2300.  First off – no dog in THIS house would sit on such a moving object without jumping off.  And it SEEMS that maybe Fido SHOULD be using the stairs if he is obese?!  I give this one a paws down.

I nearly died when I found the Ikea Hundstol – a highchair for dogs.   After a bit of exploration, I found that it was an April Fools joke.  THANK goodness.  Imagine the size highchair that Paxton would need.

It looks like the Freedom Leash didn’t turn out to be such a great invention – I don’t think you can even buy them any more.  The leash supposedly had a retracting spinning mechanism allowing a human to walk two dogs at once – holding onto one device.  I could just SEE what Frodo and I could have done to that thing.  No wonder you can’t find one.

Here’s another gem – a dog muzzle that looks like a duck’s bill.  Seriously?  Embarrassing enough that the dog HAS to wear a muzzle – and you make him look like a platypus besides?!  Paws down on this one.

The Breeze Guard Car window screen.  Ever see our screen door to the deck?  A screen for a car window?  That would last .0059 seconds with us.  Paws down for this one too.

The Bow Lingual Bark Translator is supposed to be able to translate what your dog is saying. This was obviously created as a joke.  But the best part was reading the reviews about it.  Some people, I THINK, thought the thing would REALLY work.  And they were disappointed when they tried it out.  Hmmmm.....

There is this device that you attach to your garden hose, and when your dog steps on it, he immediately gets a blast of water for a drink.  Like we PONs EVER want a blast of water shot in our faces…

An inflatable dog bath.  Kind of like those inflatable kiddie pools only smaller.  I can see all the “fun” when it deflates…

Now there ARE some good inventions…the portable camping chair that has a built-in soft-sided dog crate under the seat seems like a good idea.  For SMALL dogs obviously.  And LED collars and leashes are good at night.  The poo trap that is attached to a dog’s rear end – like a horse uses in a parade – is just plain silly.  Make sure you don’t ask Fido to “sit” after he uses it.

My human has a great idea for an invention.  She was looking on-line for a plow-like device that Paxton could pull behind him in the driveway to clear the snow.  She couldn’t find one.  So there you go all you inventive folks – the dog snow plow.  And when you make your millions, be sure to remember us!

©  Linda Wozniak