Responsible Human Ownership Day

So yesterday was Responsible Dog Ownership Day.  And I am proclaiming today as Responsible Human Ownership Day.  Because really, that's the way it is if you have a dog in your household.  So  all you dogs, here are the things that you need to do to be a responsible owner.

1. Protect your human, home and property.  Alert your human to anything unusual.  Like a delivery person, the neighbor's kid selling cookies, rabbits, or blowing leaves.  You MUST be a responsible guardian.  At all times.  Even in the middle of the night - which is a perfect time to practice your security skills. With lots of barking.
2. Eat anything and everything your human provides for you.  Don't be fussy.  Your human has supposedly worked hard to make the money to buy you your food and treats so ALWAYS take them and be grateful.  We are VERY responsible in this area.
3. Behave when being walked.  No pulling or acting wild.  Unless you see a rabbit.  Or blowing leaves.
4. Greet your human with excitement and exuberance EVERY single time they return from somewhere.  Even the bathroom.  
5. ALLOW your human to groom you.  Let's face it, we dogs don't REALLY worry about our appearance - or how we smell, but humor the humans and let them make you look and smell the way THEY want you to look.
6. Allow them to sleep on "their" bed with you.  You don't have to give them a LOT of space- it's OK if they are hanging off the edge.  But allow them their rest.  They need it to take us on our 34 walks each day.
7. Help your human to stay in shape by making them go on those 34 walks each day.  You are looking after their health - it is YOUR responsibility to ensure they get enough exercise.
8. Make SURE you stay underfoot in the kitchen.  While they may say that you are a hazard, we know that we are there to act as cleaners in the event that something should drop on the floor.  It is our responsibility to be good custodians.  And the same is true for leftover food items on the counters.  
9. When they are trying to "train" you to do a new behavior, like "sit" or "heel" - follow the commands - but do so sporadically.   It's called  intermittent reinforcement.  It allows you to get more of those treats that they worked so hard to pay for.
10. And lastly, it is your responsibility to love your human and let them know how much you love them.  Wag your tail.  Cuddle with them.  And just "be there" when you see that they need you. Provide that UNCONDITIONAL love that we canines do so well.  That is really your biggest responsibility of all...

Have a good one!