Monday, December 5, 2016

Dear Santa. Part 3.



And so it continues...

Dear Santa.

I have just a few more questions and a few notes to share, before I actually get to my list.

I understand that you "know when we are sleeping, and you know when we are awake,"  but in the off chance that you were distracted or busy, I wanted share with you the above photo.  As you no doubt know, I have a new "brother" and it has been a rather large adjustment for me - getting used to not being the baby in the household any more.  BUT - I am getting used to Astro (his REAL name is Elroy - but he doesn't answer to anything right now, so you can call him whatever you like.)  The depicted event happened the other day while my human was wrapping Christmas gifts.  She was on her way to get more wrapping paper - and she suddenly noticed the scene.  She actually gasped when she saw me and Astro together on the bed.  She had to casually move in closer to take the photo - for fear we would see her and scatter. So I am hoping that this "nice" behavior may cancel out some of my occasional indiscretions.

So a few more questions.  If one pees on the Christmas decorations outdoors, does it count as naughty?

And what do you get Baby Jesus for his birthday?  I mean this whole Christmas thing is REALLY his birthday celebration, so what do you get him?  He already has gold, frankincense and myrrh.  Mind you, I'm not sure what he DOES with those things.  I'm sure he would much rather have an iPad.  Or peace on earth. Or a PUPPY!!!

Have you ever considered changing your wardrobe?  I mean the red and white suit - which I THINK goes back to your Polish roots, is nice and all, but maybe something a bit more trendy.  By the way, I am assuming the "fur" on your suit is fake.  I'd hate to see the animal rights people spray painting your sled.  

Do your elves make ALL the gifts?  Or do you source out to other countries?  And are your elves unionized?  Not that it REALLY matters to me where my presents come from - but I'm just a curious dog.

And one more question for today- if at LEAST half of the kids around the world leave a treat for you, that's a LOT of treats.  Do you share them with your reindeer?  Yet another reason to have a dog - and take him with you on the trip. If you need a volunteer, I'm available.

To be continued...

 

 

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