Dangers

June 11.  Today is Corn on the Cob Day.  My human loves corn on the cob.  But I don’t need to tell you that corn cobs can be VERY dangerous to us dogs.  If we eat them, they don’t digest – and they can get stuck in our intestines.  That causes a blockage – and as Paxton well knows, can result in surgery.  Remember – he ate my human’s sling for her broken wrist and he had surgery.  And he had to wear the cone of shame….

There are lots of good sites on-line that tell you all the toxic substances for dogs.  The more you find – the more you think you should live in a bubble.

I decided to do a little survey of all the potentially dangerous substances around OUR house – with my suggestions on what my human can do about them.  Here we go:

Outside:

·      Hydrangeas.  My human JUST bought one last fall.  She loves the flowers.  She was not aware they are toxic to dogs.  But we knew.  That is why we continually attempt to pee on it.  We must destroy the danger.  

·      Yew.  Who knew?  Another plant to pee on – and destroy.  

·      Tulips.  We don’t have many – and they are very pretty.  But they are dangerous. Pee again – and then  just stick some plastic flowers in the ground.  That would look just as nice.  And they will last longer.

·      Toads.  I haven’t seen one in a while – but I KNOW they must be out there. Not all toads are poisonous – but don’t take a chance.  Assume they all are.  Call the neighbor’s cat.  He can kill them – and he probably won’t eat them.  Probably.

·      Mushrooms.  We live in the country.  Our house has woods around it.  We have mushrooms.  Not all mushrooms are bad.  But don’t take a chance.  No munching.  Again – pee on them.

·      Lupines?!   The pretty wild flower that grows near our road?!  They should be blooming soon.  They are sooooo pretty.  We will just refuse to walk by them.  Problem solved.

·      Ferns?!  Wait.  They are poisonous to cats.  Safe in this house.

·      Daylily.  Oh my Gosh – my human has LOADS of daylilies.  We have to move!  Wait.  Cats again.  Phew.

Inside dangers:

·      Alcohol.  Of course my human has alcohol in the house.  In case we get company.  It is VERY bad for dogs and cats.  When she goes to work tomorrow, I will dispose of any alcohol in the toilet.  We dogs must be safe.

·      Batteries.  Frodo and I are OK with this one.  But Bucket Head – we have to watch out for him.  As we know, he will eat anything.  No more flashlights in this house.  But wait –matches are also dangerous. We will be living in the dark during emergencies from now on.  And no more barbecues.

·      Coins.  Throw them in a fountain.  Just keep bills.

·      Gasoline.  Get rid of the car.  Use that bike with the flat tires in the garage.

·      Grapes and raisins and chocolate and onions and garlic and rhubarb and salt and the green parts of a tomato plant.   A little bit of some of these may not KILL us – but really – who wants a sick dog with soupy poop?  Just get rid of all of it.

So there you have it.  Our new, safe home.   I feel more relaxed already!

© Linda Wozniak