Tuesday, April 26, 2016

A squirrel named Nutso.


Honestly.  There is never a dull moment in this house.  So. Remember the squirrel-proof bird feeder that is not squirrel proof?  Here is a picture of the feeder.   


And here we are, looking very somber under the feeder.   



In theory, fat squirrels cannot get between the fencing.  BUT our squirrels are skinny.  So.  My human looked out the window the other day and saw the squirrel having a banquet on all the seed she had put in the feeder the day before.  She is having to fill the thing every second day.  Honestly, there is more bird feed being eaten in this house than dog food.  Mind you, if I had MY way that would not be the case.  Anyway, my human spotted the squirrel and ran outside to scare him away.  For the sake of this story, I’ll call the squirrel Nutso.  So Nutso USUALLY jumps down and races away.  But not THIS time.  He crawled up into the feeder.  And went INTO the tube where the food is stored.  Who KNEW he could fit up there?  So my human shook the feeder.  With a stick.  And Nutso screamed bloody murder.  All while two PONs were watching from in the house.  Also screaming bloody murder.  But now my human, who 2 minutes earlier was ready to kill Nutso, suddenly had a change of heart.  And she felt sorry for him. But she didn't want to touch the feeder for fear that Nutso would somehow jump out and attack her.  I am not joking.  So.  She got a LONG board, to try and lift the thing on the top where the seed is poured in.  All while Nutso screamed.  And two PONs screamed.  She FINALLY managed to lift the top and jumped back waiting for Nutso to come out.  But he didn’t.  So she pushed the feeder with the board.  While Nutso screamed. And two PONs screamed.  I SUPPOSE Nutso would have figured out how to climb out – but by now my human was fearing she had traumatized him.  I am not joking.  So NOW, she took the long board, and lifted the feeder off the branch and onto the ground.  And she TIPPED the feeder.  At which point Nutso jumped out and RACED off into the woods.  Faster than the bunny.  While we watched in amazement.  My human REFILLED the feeder and came in the house.  All happy that she had saved a squirrel that is driving her crazy. 

And you WONDER why I am the way I am?  Humans.  What else can I say?  Oh. Yes.  And guess who was back emptying the feeder - the VERY next day?! And my human says I am food driven.  I think I have met my match!

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